Something Special <3

So I was going through my stuff and I found my old journal from summer with this written in it and wanted to share. :)

08-08-09

The past week I spent in Orland, Florida with my greatest most amazing friends anyone could ever have! We were in Orlando for National Fine Arts and Convention. It was so amazing and I have so many great times, memories and stories I would love to tell about, but I think I'll tell you about those later. Right now, I want to focus more on what I learned this week down there, and what we got out of this as a team.

I'd never be able to fully express how special our group is. You wouldn't believe if you saw. So let me explain a little bit. In short, we are all VERY different people. We have different dreams, live totally different lives, have different paths we will follow, but what we share is what brought us together. Our differences just make it all the more special. We share a love and a heart for God. We share with each other. We're all so very different, and that is not hard to see, but as I said it's our differences that make what we have even more special and beautiful. I guess I might need to explain a bit (which is the purpose of this...)

Going from oldest to youngest - first there is Vanessa (Ness). She just graduated from high school. Nessa is like the "mother bird" or the "big sister" of us all. She's really sweet and caring. She loves to shop (she's like the fashion queen!) and is almost always smiling. She is quick to take control when a situation starts to get out of hand, and is always there. She's going to be a nurse. (And know she'll make a great one!)

Next is me! And to explain -- I'm just me! I love to dance and worship God and I want to work in ministry after High School. I'm not exactly sure WHO I am in this group. Although, they have described me as a workaholic at times and ambitious...and a brainiac...But I'm just me. I'm different. And I love it! I'm so thankful that God put these girls in my life! I would not be the same without them!

Next is Emily (Emilina!). he is a senior in High School like me. Emily has such a passion for God and worship and has the MOST AMAZING voice! I swear she'll be famous someday! And even if she's not, she's that good and so much better. But even aside from all that - she's real. I love that bout her! She's true to herself and when she's committed to something, she pours her heart into it. Everything she's got - and God always gets the glory. She's so sweet and has a beautiful heart and above all else, trusts God in everything.

Now there is Erica. She is a junior in High School. She loves to sing, dance, and act - she is the greatest when it comes to that! And she stands strong on what she believes in. In everything she trusts God to keep her going and to lead her in his way. She has such passion and heart and strength. She loves horses and has a heart for the lost and broken. God is going to use her in amazing ways.

Then there is Eden (E). Eden is a sophomore in high school. And to describe her well....she's Eden. She's amazing and I know no one else like her. She's real, she's herself. She's different and proud of it. I'd say she's one of the most grounded in our group. She loves Music and is probably going to be a missionary. But wherever God takes her, I cannot wait to see. She's going to do amazing things I know!

Next is Sarah, (Sar-rocks!). Sarah is really sweet, loves drama and is really good at it! (Ok that's an understatement. You ought to see this girl! You wouldn't believe the stuff she memorizes! You'd be blown away! She's def the drama queen-- and I mean that in a good way!) I realize we all have different styles and all, but Sarah stands out as the princess! I rarely see her without a dress. She wears them constantly! She always brings a smile to everyone's face and truly cares for people. She loves music and plays guitar. All out - she rocks! (Oh and she takes around Diego, Dora and Sarah the Mammoth for all of our youth activities! It's the greatest! I believe they are her loyal sidekicks! lol.)

Then there is Jess, ....actually....I think jess is older than Sarah...lol...yeah she is. haha. Jess is all around amazing! She's a gifted musician with a heart after God. Jess is friends with everyone and reaches out to everyone, and has the ability to just pull them in. She never gives up and is always praying for her friends to come to Christ. This girl is gonna be famous someday I just know it! She's amazing with music and dance and with communication. She is sincere and caring, and probably the most humorous of us all...especially when you put her with Emily... (AHHHHHHHH!!!!)

And there is Lydia. She's what i call a diva. Really sweet, spunky, amazing voice, and is gifted. Lydia is our "country girl." She and Erica kind of relate on that level I think. It is really cool though. Lydia loves horses, and music, and well...a lot of stuff! I love this girl! She's got this great personality that just shines through. She loves God with all of her heart. She has a great call on her life and I know that God is working in her in awesome ways! I can't wait to see where He will bring her to!

We all are different ages, and in different places in our lives. We come from different backgrounds, live totally different lives, and yet - we're best friends. What makes us so special is our differences. And we love each other because of them. It makes us strong as a group and it separates us from other groups, out there. We cover each other's weaknesses. There are no limitations. Like i said before, we are all so different - our friendships are unheard of anywhere else, but God brought us together. He is one thing we all have in common. But we're we're best friends, and even though someday we may go our separate ways as we are called, we'll always carry a little bit of each other everywhere. And we'll always be friends.

We've had good times and bad. This week was amazing. Some bits of it got stressful and were hard, but we pull through together. And sometimes things come up or out that shouldn't. It is just the enemy trying to break our unity. We were brought together to glorify God in what we do. Our friendship is from him, bound by him, and all for Him.

This group of girls is special to me. We can all be ourselves when we're together. We're all so different and every one of them is just amazing! I think they'll all be famous someday! haha. It really wouldn't surprise me!

Anyways, I love you girls! Thanks for being such a great part of my life and for accepting me for who I am. God bless you always. I continually keep you in my prayers! I know God will do something amazing with each one of you! Know that you're all very special to me and I love you.

Remember - We'll always take a piece of each other with us everywhere we go. We have so much we share together! You girls make me proud, and it's my prayer that you never stop going after God, that you'll always be who you are, stay strong, be the beautiful, passionate, gifted, uniquely designed and glorious girls that God created you all to be! Don't change for anyone!

Thanks for the memories, the good times and the bad. Thanks for just being there. I know this week in Orlando is something that we'll carry with us. It's part of our journey together. I don't know where the road will take us, and I don't ever want it to end! Thanks for everything. Proud of you all, and I love you dearly.

God bless always!

Thoughts on Writing and Speech (mainly writing)

As many of you know, I've been working on a book lately...well two books really. The first one is fiction - Stars in the Storm - and although it has meaning to me, upon starting my non-fiction book on singleness, I've realized something. Both of these books mean something to me. Stars in the Storm is more about seeing God's light in the midst of the great tempest that may be surrounding you. It has a lot of meaning for me, as I'm making a story and applying how God taught me to look for his light. Although the story is not really about my situation or my life, it's still made personal for me, but it's lying underneath a heavy blanket of dramatics and fiction.

My "Single Seasons" book however, I'm already learning that it's going to be a little harder. Writing this requires a lot of vulnerability on my part as the author. Who honestly wants to make themselves vulnerable to the criticism of others? Any hands here? Hrm. Just as I thought- No one! We don't like to feel weak. We put walls around ourselves. We like to portray a story in our lives that is a fairy tale. Or maybe not even a fairy tale, but what we like to portray is a life that we got all together. Perfection. When it comes to writing, the best comes from the heart. It comes from truth. And it comes with meaning. For years I've kept what I knew to be my best writing to myself. My school papers and such were never as good as what I wrote and never showed. It came down to vulnerability. I never wanted to make myself vulnerable, and that's what true writing does. Consider what comes from your mind to pen to paper. When it is something that no one will ever see, is that not when the words flow the most? We hide inside of ourselves. That's what I've done for so long. But in the process of beginning to write this book, I'm finding that is no longer possible. To write this book and not open up with it, is to write without passion, it is to write in a shadow. I could beat around the bush, and touch up on the bare edges of my heart, but to do that would be to fail. I would fail not only as an author, but I would fail my goal. This book has a purpose. So I must write it with that purpose in mind.

Everyone has their secrets or thoughts that they don't want to come out. Some because they're ashamed of them, and some because they do not want to ruin the illusion of their perfect life that they have portrayed. Good writing gets personal. You can learn a lot about an author from reading their writing. Just as you can learn a lot about a friend just from listening or from watching them.

To make yourself vulnerable is to open yourself to criticism. It hurts sometimes. You keep everything in and nurse your thoughts and plans in your heart, then when you finally open up to show them, sometimes you might get shot down. Sometimes it hurts. But other times it can be very rewarding.


It's ones most guarded thoughts that sometimes really truly get the point across. It is those thoughts that really hit home.

For instance, I've never been a big fan of history. It was a most dull subject for me to endure. But when it came to the books I was reading, it wasn't the normal text book that I remember reading from, it was the personal diaries or works of the people who lived in that day. I believe that there is a power in the passionate vulnerable writing. When all is turned to paper, you get the whole picture. Boarder-line doesn't cut it. At least not here.

The journals of Rachel Scott come to mind here. For those who don't know, Rachel Scott was one of the Columbine Martyr victims. Now, I realize that she did not mean for her journals to become a book, but what she wrote was meant for her and God. She wrote so openly holding nothing back. She was honest in her writing. And I couldn't help but when reading her story and reading her journals to feel inspired. She was transparent in her writing. She was passionate. She was honest. And you know what? Her story is powerful. Her words were powerful.

Where would we all be today if we held nothing back?. If we wrote honestly and if we spoke our thoughts? Words can be powerful. They can build up and they can tear down. One word to encourage one to pursue their dream or to keep going, but one word can also kill a dream.

Vulnerability. Transparency. Truth. Passion. Those are what make up a true power in writing. When we expose ourselves, we may be subject to ridicule. But who are others to ridicule us? What lies behind their portrayal of perfection? I realize that taking down the walls that we fortify around ourselves can be hard to do. I still find it hard today. And I've found that at times, it can make you feel weak, but it makes you stronger.

So from here on, this is how my words will be. Both spoken and written.

My words will be truth. My words will be real. My words will reveal what is in me. My heart, my thoughts. My words will be passionate and spoken from the heart. My words will be kind and gentle and warm. My words will be pure. My words will inspire. My words will be given to me by God. He's promised that He will give me the words - now I just have to listen for them.

This note hasn't quite gone the way I thought it would. I planned to end one place and went to another. But these are my thoughts. And thoughts can take you on a new road every time. :)

~Brittany